What Women Want From Their Husbands
Here’s a guide to help men know what is really important
By: Sheri Stritof
We all have emotional needs in a long-term relationship regardless of gender. Some of these emotional needs include to love and feel loved, to feel important and special, to feel like someone has your back. These emotional needs are dependent upon the individual and their internal make-up. Although you will not wither away and die without these things, we tend to feel rather deprived and disconnected without them.
On the other hand, we have “wants.” These are what we believe we should get from our partners to have a satisfying relationship. Men and women want a lot of the same things from a significant other. But, there are some differences that seem to be more thematic of a particular gender.
Here is a list of some of those things that many women often want from their husbands. They are not listed in any particular order or rank.
Related: What Men Want
- Telling Her Daily That She is Loved
Everyone wants to be affirmed. Everyone wants to know they are loved. Women really feel good when they hear the word “I love you” but, Indirect ways can also work. In fact, the best ways to say “I love you” are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.
- Understanding and Forgiveness
There will be days when your wife will make mistakes or when she will be difficult to be around. No one is perfect. She both wants and deserves your willingness to understand and forgive her. Remember that no relationship, and especially marriage, can be sustained without forgiveness.
- Real Conversation
Don’t let your conversations with your wife dwindle to nothing but talk about your kids, your jobs, and the weather. If that happens, your marriage relationship could be in real trouble. There is lots more to talk about. In fact there is something critical for couples to talk about everyday that will help make their marriage last: feelings and emotions.
- Quality Time with Her (and Your Children)
Having quality time with your wife and kids isn’t something that just happens. You have to make it happen by not only making the plans but by following through. Time with those you love has to be a high priority for you.
- Say “Yes” More Than Saying “No”
Habitual negative responses to your wife and kids can push them away from you. Think twice before saying “no” and you will be surprised at how saying “yes” can improve your relationships.
- Listen Well
It’s really disheartening for a wife to share her thoughts and feelings with her mate and then realize that he didn’t actually listen to her. Your wife wants you to not only listen with your ears, but to listen with your heart.
Men who respect their wives opinions have much happier marriages!
- Affection and Kindness
How often do you say “please” or “thank you” or give your spouse an unexpected kiss? Unfortunately, some married couples forget that being kind and affectionate to one another are keys to a successful marriage.
- Share Household and Child Rearing Responsibilities
One of the main reasons couples fight is conflict over who is doing what around the house. Chores and child care are not the sole responsibility of your wife. She shouldn’t have to ask you to do your share around the house.
- A Day Off Now and Then
Don’t fuss about your wife taking a day off several times a month. This means that she will be free from worrying about what is happening with the kids, the house, the pets, and you. She deserves this break in her schedule and she needs to provide it for herself to be emotionally and physically healthy.
- Commitment to Take Care of Yourself Both Physically and Emotionally
Many men are notorious for not taking care of themselves when it comes to health issues. This isn’t fair to your wife. She is your lover — not your mother. Take responsibility for your own health concerns.
You Want to Be a Great Spouse
Unless you have a very cold heart, you want to be a great spouse. How can you be a great spouse and not just a good spouse?
Although not a complete list, here are a few suggestions for this important role.
- Believe in yourself.
- Show your spouse your love. There will be times when you may not like your spouse’s behavior, but let your mate know that your love is constant. Say I Love You
- Listen to your spouse. You may not like what your spouse is saying, you may not agree with what is being said, but listen.
- Don’t be phony in your praise or support of what your spouse has done or is considering doing.
- Admit to making mistakes, be willing to apologize, ask for forgiveness, and also forgive.
- Communicate honestly not only your thoughts but also your feelings.
- Keep your promises.
- Show respect, trust, appreciation, consideration and kindness.
- Resolve past issues and handle conflict in a healthy way.
- Understand your spouse’s need for personal space and time.
- Try to be a good role model in how you live your life in:
- How you spend your time and money and create balance in how both are spent. Balance in work and Home
- How you show your hope for the future.
- How you create memories and rituals.
- How you continue to have dreams of what you want to do and become.
- How you have fun. Having Fun Together
- How you solve problems.
- How you handle the consequences of your decisions. Natural and Logical Consequences
- How you deal with both happiness and sadness.
- How you live out your sense of morality.
- By the friendships you choose.
- By your daily habits. Annoying Habits
- How you take care of yourself. Healthy Living
- How you cope in a crisis. Coping with Disaster and Crisis
- How you share in the responsibilities of parenting and household chores. Dividing Household Chores